Family Tree
Five branches from the trunk of the split tree
Four girls and a fella, that’s my siblings and me
In three years we went from complete to shut down
Two people once in love
No one left to be found
Does your family tree number the stars of its next generation?
Or does its roots shrivel up...
No fruit, no seed
No fruit, no seed
The only fruit was five branches
That’s my siblings and me
Five different houses
Four different spouses
Three different schools
Two different cars
One school bus that would transfer me
to whom I should belong to for that week
Imagine what it's like growing up loving life when you are six
But hating it when you are eight
Because of my parents.
My parents.
Parents.
It’s kind of an unfortunate resemblance
To pair rent
Like a pair of people renting out space to one another’s hearts
It’s kind of an unfortunate resemblance
To pair rend
Like a pair of people who are rending a whole child’s universe because their own is torn apart
Because of their parents.
Their Parents.
Parents.
Like the two words that mean the same thing to pare and to rend
To trim and to tear
Like the two words that would never sit together but had no problem putting me in the middle
And I would be stuck riding on route 56
Goin’ to Grandview? Or is it Hastings Street?
One school bus that would transfer me
to whom I should belong to for that week
Monday Tuesday Dad
Wednesday Thursday Mom
Fridays Weekends we switch
Like the holidays we switch
As if our lives were a fair-trade in monopoly
They’ve put me in jail, I want to be free
Only way to get out is if I pay the fee
Monday Tuesday Dad
Wednesday Thursday Mom
Fridays Weekends we switch
Like the holidays we switch
Leave the lights off we switch
Turn the lights on we switch
On switch Off switch
Lights camera action
I began performing at eight
But it was never enough
I should’ve started at seven
Maybe then they would have seen
That the twinkling in my eye would have mended their broken seams
A sixth child came along
To whom did she belong
Everyone else was celebrated, but where was her song?
I chose her to be a part of our five
But there wasn’t room for another girl
She hardly survived
For far too long I didn’t understand the implications
Three tiers it seemed for our family vacations
From two parents to three
From four to none
Once I had hoped for our family tree
To come back together so we could be complete
But what made us complete was the growth from the tree
Six strong branches
That’s my siblings and me
Description:
This poem surfaces the image of a family tree and the struggle to navigate it, when its "boughs" change. There are personal references to bus stops, pasttimes, and if you catch it, an unexpected "addition" to the family after infidelity. One poetic device I utilize often is counting - something that most children learn to do as they engage their natural world. For me, counting was a form of giving structure to the chaos of my young life which changed rapidly after my parents' relationship weakened and ultimately ended when I turned eight. It is challenging to dissect one's own need to perform and cope; compassion for one's own parents, recognizing their own woundedness; and appreciation for one's own growth in such a time. This poem seeks to integrate each of those and more.
About the Author:
Hi there. Here's the quick version: I was born in 1993, I have nine siblings, and over 30 houses to call "home." While I can't tell you with confidence whether or not I really do know how to distinguish between the uses of a semicolon and a colon: I do love to write and express myself through spoken word poetry and freestyle rap. Finally, I know to whom I belong and I pray that these words help
Reflection Questions for Small Groups or Individuals
How does Sofia's poem speak to you?
In the poem, Sofia relies on a lot of number to help tell her story. She says that "counting was a form of giving structure to the chaos of [her] young life..." Did you have any similar tools that helped provide structure to your life?