In my previous post “Believe His Voice,” I told in detail about my struggle with the different voices in my head, all vying for power and control. Once I came to realize and recognize the voices I was hearing, so many things became clearer in my life. Simply knowing what was going on in my mind and heart was (and is) empowering. The question then shifted from, “What is going on in my head?” to “How? How do I follow the correct voice? Now that I know the voices are false, how do I find the One that is true? What does it look like practically to take steps towards healing and the wholeness of my mind?” 

Although I in no way claim to be an expert or to have all the answers, I want to share with you four ways I have found to help me in this day to day struggle.

First: Turn to Holy Scripture. 

In realizing how desperately I needed my mind to be renewed (see Romans 12:2), I also quickly realized I would need to give my mind something true to think upon. A few months ago, I started to feel very convicted to memorize scripture verses. I did find I had quite a few memorized already just from years of attending mass, Catholic school and various bible studies, but I wanted to memorize some that were the “antidote,” so to speak, for my particular struggles. As I found verses that resonated, I wrote them on index cards and hung them up around the edge of the mirror in the bedroom and have them scattered around my night table. Here are a few examples of my “antidotes”: 

When I feel scared or the wounds of division come into play, I pray:

When I feel overwhelmed by my weakness and sinfulness, I pray:

When I feel alone and abandoned, I pray:

Ask the Holy Spirit to guide you to the verses you need for your situations. And when the false voices seem too loud, push back with God’s truth. I have found it so powerful to repeat these verses over and over when faced with difficult situations (especially at 3 a.m. when my brain seems the most convinced that I should listen to all the crazy).

Second: Start Accepting Your Brokenness

Matthew Kelly states in his book Life is Messy:

“Everyone is broken, everyone is wounded, to pretend otherwise is to open ourselves to vast and ongoing deception. But it’s ok that we are broken. It’s only a problem if we subscribe to the false notion that we have to try to keep everyone and everything from being broken. I am broken. Pretending otherwise is exhausting” (pg 3). 

When I read these lines, I felt like a weight had been lifted. All the false voices in my head often try to convince me to either ignore my brokenness altogether or else to despair because I am too broken (or so much more broken than other people). 

As I face situations where I come face to face with my brokenness (multiple times a day), I try to remember to be gentle with myself and with the voices in my head. They are just trying to protect me (really I am just trying to protect myself), but ignoring the problems or despairing over them has not helped at all! Little by little, I am trying, with the Holy Spirit, to see the broken parts of my heart as Christ sees them - as fountains of Grace when given over to His Love and Mercy. The first step toward life-giving wounds is seeing the wounds and sitting with them rather than running away from them. 

Third: Imaginative Prayer 

Although this process heavily involves scripture, I place it in a different category than tool #1. Over the years, various books and prayer ministries I have encountered recommend using a scripture passage or an image (I will list a few shortly) and allowing the Holy Spirit to use it to guide these different voices back home. In “Believe His Voice,” I mentioned how critical wholeness is on the healing journey. For me, a huge part of my healing journey has been reflecting on these inner voices and locating where in my past they came from (each one is usually attached to a certain memory or set of memories), and then using imaginative prayer to allow Jesus to bring home those broken parts of my heart. 

The scripture passages I have found most helpful are the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32) and the Raising of Lazarus (John 11). For both of these, the simple process I have used is to start by asking the Holy Spirit to guide me and then place myself prayerfully in the passage (either with the father awaiting the son or with Jesus outside the tomb). Then, I imagine the broken part of myself being welcomed home by the father or raised to life again by Jesus. Different details from the passages have become important for different parts of my story. I encourage you to ask the Lord to lead you in this prayer and show you what parts of the story are needed for you and your journey. 

Recently, the prayer card image from LGW, “Let the Children of Divorce Come to Me,” has been a key aspect in my prayer. When I encounter those inner voices full of shame and lies, the line from the prayer on the back of the card that speaks to my heart is: “I will place in you all my trust and hope, for you lift my gaze from shame, fear and the pain of division to your unparalleled love for me on the cross.” I imagine myself in the place of the boy in the image, with Jesus gently lifting my eyes from shame and fear, to the look of love and mercy on his face. It can be so easy to get sucked into the pain and wounds and to take my eyes off of Jesus. When the voices are loud, I encourage you to allow Him to lift your gaze and dispel all that is not of Him. 

(Editors note: prayer cards and art prints of this sacred art are available here in English and here in Spanish. A full description of the artwork is available here.)

Four: Hear His Voice First

This one is very practical and simple, and yet might also be the most challenging of my suggestions. I have found it is immensely important for me to hear the voice of Christ, the voice of Truth, first in my day. Doing so orients my heart and my day towards Him. We were made to hear and know the voice of the Good Shepherd, but it is all too easy to listen to the voice of a stranger (see John 10:5). The most practical way I have found to ensure I hear His voice first in my life is to leave my cell phone downstairs. Doing so has allowed me to focus on my prayer first thing in the morning instead of allowing other voices to guide my day. I am convinced this makes a huge difference in my life. Even if you don’t have a huge amount of time first thing in the morning, those first few moments (even just the time it takes to get up and walk to the next room) means you are reaching for Jesus first. 

Let me say again that I am no expert here and I need to do all of these things just as much as the next person! This list is also not definitive and certainly not meant to be restrictive. These are simply ways I have found to attune my ears to hear the voice of my true Father in my head. Take with you what resonates and leave behind anything that will not serve you. We are all in this together and I pray these four practices help you to hear and know the voice of the One who loves you! 

About the author:

Stephanie is a wife and mother of three boys. She and her family live in Pennsylvania. Her husband works for their local parish and she homeschools their boys. According to her eight year old, she enjoys reading, napping and watching The Chosen.

Reflection Questions for Small Groups or Individuals

1. What voices do you hear in your head? What are they telling you?

2. “How do [you] follow the correct voice?” The True voice of Him who first loves you?

3. What other ways would you add to Stephanie’s list that you would share with others?